How Do I Get My In-laws To Fix Their Dog? He Is A Problem Around My Daughter!?
ByMy in-laws’ dog is four years old and un-neutered. They were supposedly going to breed him but haven’t done anything. I know neutered dogs are calmer because they aren’t all hyped up on hormones. He is so spastic that he will knock my one-year old daughter over and sit on her when she’s on someone’s lap. He is out of control and I’m afraid he’s going to hurt her. I know it could just be his personality, but other relatives have dogs from the same litter who are fixed and NOTHING like him (MUCH calmer). When I told my mother-in-law to fix him I phrased it by saying it would be good for the dog (lower chances of prostate/testicular cancer). She was like, “I know,” but that’s it. She hasn’t done anything. I would think she would want to do something good for his health and protect her granddaughter from getting injured by him but I guess not. My husband has said we can kidnap him and just fix him for them, lol. What should I do?
13 Comments
November 5th, 2009 at 11:29 am
After puberty (18 mos-2 years) altering a dog may not really affect his personality. Neutering doesn’t fix everything.
They can either crate the dog when your daughter is there, they can teach the dog some manners by doing obedience, or you can not take your daughter there to visit.
I personally would insist on a crate, or that the dog be on a leash and one of them be in control of the leash.
There are also harnesses that prevent a dog from jumping, but I am not a big fan of those, and can’t comment on their effectiveness.
Sounds like the dog has no manners, which neutering will not cure.
November 5th, 2009 at 12:57 pm
tell her what you just told us.
I too have this problem with my parents who cant figure ot why every man dog they have pees in the house but they cant see the sense in neutering an inside animal. The only thing I would know to do is tell them what you told us, give them lots of literature of the pros on spaying/neutering, give her the facts.
November 5th, 2009 at 5:53 pm
Tell your in-laws your concerns about the dog being around your daughter. They should understand after all it is their granddaughters health they should be worried about. Tell them that they shouldnt breed their dog because theres enough dogs in shelters so why bring more puppies into the world? The dog would live so much longer being castrated and would be friendlier and less hyper. You need to talk to them..most of all get your husband to talk to them. Its for the safetly of their grandchild they should understand.
November 5th, 2009 at 11:23 pm
well chances are that even having him neutered won’t help as now it has become behavioral it’s all in the training. Maybe she can’t afford to have him fixed. Give her a gift card to the vet of her choice or an obedience training certificate for christmas lol or you could just be honest and tell her you fear for the safety of your child. Don’t be boarish about it just express concern. Then stop and think has he hurt her before? Are you being over protective? Trust me there is nothing wrong with protecting your child just be sure you are being reasonable about it. Worst come to worst if sounds like you have a supportive husband that will stand behind you if say you just invite them to your house instead of going there and gently let them know their dog is not welcome to join them. Best of luck.
November 6th, 2009 at 5:04 am
You should mind your own business about their choices for the dog and just keep your daughter away from him.
Neutering him is not going to change his personality to any significant degree. He’ll still be just as bouncy, and just as likely to injure your daughter.
November 6th, 2009 at 6:21 am
For your daughters safety tell them you either want the dog put up if they aren’t going to get him fixed or that you will no longer bring the grandchild around as you are afraid of her safety. Tehy know it’s best for the dog.
TEll tehm they are welcome to come visit but don’t bring the dog.
maybe then they will get teh idea and again it’s for your daughtes safety.
November 6th, 2009 at 9:37 am
your husband should be the one talking to his mother. Your daughter is also his. You are in more awkward position to demand your mother–in-law to do something she does not want. If you husband cares about your daughter, he should try to convince his own mother.
November 6th, 2009 at 1:57 pm
I would have another talk to your MIL, but continue on the tactful lines because these things can get out of hand easily.
Wait until he bumps your daughter again and tell her how unhappy this makes you. Tell her you are concerned about his behaviour and that she and her husband are allowing this to happen. Say, if she doesn’t feel able to do anything about it that they – the humans, will have to start visiting you in your home WITHOUT the dog. Tell her, you dont want this to be a huge issue but you feel you really need to protect your daughter.
I also feel that it is too late to expect neutering to solve the problem. The main problem is that the dog has been allowed to continue in this way, a way which is unacceptable to most people. he needs to be trained now but it will be very tough – they will need to be very tough on him because he will object strongly.
I would only be happy with him locked in a crate when you are visiting, or out of the house.
My friends’ parents have a Staffordshire Bull Terrier dog – also entire, who rules the house. He does what he likes, wrecks the place, goes mad at passers by from the bay window, then goes and rewards himself from the over-flowing feed dish. If you challenge him he will bark and bark and bark, in your face, the only thing you can do is to turn your back on him. he is like a bomb waiting to explode. It is a shame because he can be a lovely dog but he is out of control and they are too ignorant to know what to do. They didn’t buy him, he was left there by their eldest daughters ex-boyfriend.
I insist he is locked outside when I visit, and I ring on my mobile phone to make sure he is locked out before I knock on the door.
These dogs need expert training. Good luck with your stance, you need to confront it one way or another before your daughter gets injured
November 6th, 2009 at 2:12 pm
Don’t take your daughter over to their house.
November 6th, 2009 at 7:16 pm
I would just tell them about the problems that you’ve had with the dog knocking over the baby. Tell them that you’ve heard that neutered dogs are generally calmer but they also have the option of locking the dog up when you come over.
November 6th, 2009 at 8:01 pm
Your daughter is more important, and yes he could hurt her by accident. He not only NEEDS to neutered but also needs obedience training. If it were me I would have to (for my daughter) tell them he’s not welcome at my home, it’s not worth the risk. They should get the message.
Best of luck
November 6th, 2009 at 9:28 pm
Perhaps the dog needs to learn some manners. He should be exercised daily to drain his excess energy and then taught to be submissive around children. Do not allow him to sit on her. Make him lay down calmly around her.
I agree he should be neutered but this won’t fix his hyperactivity if he is under exercised and not given any discipline or rules.
Tell you in-laws if this is not corrected it will escalate and only get worse. I’m sure they will understand if you firmly express your concerns in a non-threatening manner.
November 6th, 2009 at 10:30 pm
Neutering is not a cure for what you’re describing…what the dog needs is training!
He needs 2 things – To be enrolled in an obedience class AND to be neutered. The dog isn’t too old for either one.
It’s a common myth that a dog will be “Calmer” after being neutered – If you could see a before and after shot of my 8 month old Aussie, you too would see that it’s just a myth!